Ten Tips to Improve Your Self-Esteem

The best way to improve your life and earn the respect of others is to improve your self-esteem. This is not a very difficult task. All that it needs is good guidance. Here are ten tips that can happen when you improve your self--esteem.

1. You should surround yourself with people who are positive and supportive, and shun friends who are cynical and negative. This will generate a huge swell of positive feelings in you. You will respect yourself more, and your self-esteem will grow.

2. You should be clear about what you want to achieve in life. Set goals, and work for their achievement. To make your task easier, break your main goal into several smaller goals which are relatively easier to achieve. This will make the task of reaching your main goals seem easier. It will also give you a feeling of satisfaction whenever you achieve one of the smaller goals.

3. Always be positive about yourself and keep reminding yourself about your good qualities, your accomplishments and how you help your family, friends, others and yourself. Don’t make the mistake of brooding over negative things, and never put yourself down.

4. Develop the ability to accept criticism about yourself, without getting upset or defensive. This will help you eliminate your weaknesses one by one. However, make sure that the criticism is constructive. Don’t allow yourself to be overwhelmed by criticism that is cynical or meant to lower your self-esteem. This will be a great mistake, and do irreparable damage to your self-esteem.

5. We all need to accept the fact that we will fail from time to time. We should not let it get us down or to have too much of a negative effect on us. We should think that we have not been successful this time and that we will succeed the next time. This will help us to pull ourselves together and move on. Such an attitude will help us overcome the most difficult conditions.

6. Never compare yourself with others. This is the easiest way to feel inferior and lose self-esteem. It is much better to rate yourself on your achievements. Such an approach will give you self-confidence. At the same time it will make you feel better when dealing with your peer group.

7. Never put yourself down. Failures are like parasites. If you allow them to grow they will eat away your self-confidence, self-respect and self-esteem. The best is to push negative thoughts out of your mind, if you want others to treat you with respect. This can only happen when you project a positive exterior, even in most adverse situations. Make it a point to filter out all self-criticism.

8. Don’t give in to bullies in your place of work or in your personal life. You must learn to stand up to them. This can only happen if you are assertive about your rights. Of course, this does not mean that you should pick up physical battles to make your point. On the contrary, you should exercise restraint and make your point in a dignified manner. This will not only make others treat you with respect but also increase your self-esteem.

9. You may be self-conscious and because of this you may avoid talking to groups of people. Try to approach groups of people and introduce yourself to them. Ask them questions about themselves and try to be genuinely interested in the answers. Listen carefully and attentively to what they say and respond to show your interest. Interacting with people will make you feel more relaxed. You will realize that it is easy to speak to groups of people and to relax by concentrating on what others are saying, rather than on yourself.

10. Self-esteem is also dependent upon the felling of well-being. A lazy person or a poorly groomed person will always feel inferior to a confident, smart individual. So, you need to take good care of your body. Remember, a healthy body is essential for a healthy mind.

Socializing with Confidence

One of the most nerve-wracking situations for many people is attending social events, particularly those where you don't know anyone else. If you're like many people, you have visions of yourself standing alone, looking awkward, sweating, and sneaking out the side door early. Socializing is difficult for many people. Why? For one, it's a perfect opportunity for rejection.

After all, if you say or do something stupid, it's very easy for the other person to move on to someone else if they find your conversation dull. Or another scenario is one where you're stuck at a table with a bunch of other people you don't know, and you envision yourself staring at your plate all through the meal, completely at a loss of words.

These fears are very common and normal. That's good. It means that, if you feel this way, you're not alone. It also means that when you're feeling awkward in a social situation, others are as well. Even some people who appear to be completely at ease may have a jumble of nerves and self-doubt inside. So what's the solution? If you are the person who speaks out first, makes the first move, and begins a conversation, you're taking the pressure off the other person. No longer are you now the one who is awkward at socializing, but you are now someone who is focused on the other people attending.

Changing your frame of mind in this way can be very helpful. It's also more helpful than changing your frame of mind in other ways, such as using alcohol or other medications (unless you've had a thorough check-up with a doctor who has prescribed anti-anxiety medications). It's true that alcohol can put you at ease and make starting a conversation much easier. The problem is that it also makes it much easier to take another drink, and another, and before you know it (or don't), you really are saying or doing something stupid. Unless you are absolutely confident (no pun intended) in your ability to control your drinking, avoid using this method as a solution to your social fears.

After you have reminded yourself that many other people there are feeling just as nervous as you are, try striking up a conversation. This is easier than it may seem--or at least, it does become easier with practice. One of the best ways to start a conversation is to ask questions. Then keep asking them. People like to talk about themselves, and it's also a subject that we all know well--so this avoids awkward moments trying to discuss the latest political issue or historical fact that someone may not be "up" on for whatever reason (life can get in the way sometimes).

The key to making this work, however, is to actually be interested in what the other person has to say. If you're constantly looking around, interrupting, or giving other signs that you're not interested, you'll quickly offend the other person, who may well walk away. Then you will find yourself in the situation you're trying to avoid.

When possible, take a buddy with you. Just be sure that you don't hide in the corner only talking to each other. Instead, use the "buddy system" to meet new people together. It's always easier when you have someone on your side. Simply knowing that at least one other person there likes you and is rooting for you can give you an instant confidence booster as you reach out to new people. Using the buddy method is also a great way to practice before you have to strike out on your own, which is likely to happen at least once in your lifetime. Feeling prepared will make you feel much more confident when you do find yourself in this scenario.

Forcing yourself to learn new social skills is scary. You are taking a risk. However, once you make the effort, even if it doesn't go as well as you'd hoped, you can feel better about yourself knowing you made the effort. Next time will go better. Give yourself credit for trying.

Self Confident People Make a Mighty Nation

Self-confident people generate money

Self-confident people are filled with optimism and positive thoughts. They have an “I Can” attitude towards life and think it is possible to do great things. They are an asset to the organization they work for as they can be given tasks that demand greater responsibility and accountability.

They hence keep up the quality, which in turn helps their employers to reap greater profits and thus contribute to the well being of both employees and the employer. People like Bill Gates have contributed millions of dollars to the economies of their countries and have been involved in lots of philanthropic work worldwide as well.

Self-confident people generate jobs

Self-confident people are natural risk takers and have enough courage to pursue their innovative dreams. Self-confident people often work very hard for the dreams they believe in and often end up as becoming successful entrepreneurs. They create a lot of jobs for others by their innovative business ventures.

Though Edison faced a lot of difficulties as a child, his mother ensured that his self-confidence did not die. She made all efforts to encourage him and see him become successful. Today GE started by Edison is one of the world’s most competitive corporate organizations and is a hugely admired employer of thousands of people

Self-confident people make the nation self dependent

Entrepreneurs are a great catalyst of growth in any country. They do not sit idly waiting for the government reforms to come and pull them out. Instead they work out innovative ideas, which have commercial feasibility as well. They share the burden of the state by employing other people and giving them jobs.

It saves the government lots of effort and money that could have been wasted in providing for the jobless youth. The money saved can then be routed to other developmental works for the benefit of all. The country does not need to borrow from the organisations like the World Bank and can deal with its developmental affairs independently.

Self-confident people present a better image of the nation

A nation of busy people conducting their day-to-day affairs is much better picture than having unemployed people taking on bad habits and creating a nuisance. Self-confident people are the face of any country, signifying optimism, hard work, determination and self-reliance. This helps the country to portray a picture of hope, dynamism, and growth to foreign investors who would like to conduct business activity and invest money in the country. This help create more and more jobs and a culture of hard work and achievement.

Self-confident people develop a habit of winning

Failure is an addiction and so is winning. It is just a matter of putting your efforts and thoughts in the right direction to become a winner and self-confident people do just that. A positive thought and self-confidence is what is needed to take an initiative, and a small achievement becomes the source of energy. This energy also gives a boost to the self-confidence of a person to take on a bigger leap and get successful. Thus every achievement breeds another initiative for yet another achievement!

Self-confident people help other people achieve their dreams

A person other than having the feeling of kindness and compassion for fellow human beings should also have enough resources or the ability to create resources to be able to help other people for the same. Self-confident people therefore are willing to give a helping hand to people and pull them up.

Self-confident people are an inspiration to others

Self-confident people succeed on both their professional and personal fronts. Self-confident people are respected and often spark others to perform as well and serve as a great inspiration for other people. People take a lesson from their struggles and their ability to turn failure into achievement.

Self-confident people strengthen the fabric of society

An idle mind is a devil’s workshop. Self-confident people in a way save the society from the devil by being busy and involved in constructive activities. People tend to get inspired from self-confident people and the general atmosphere becomes that of hard work and achievement. Such an environment is conducive for growth and development and self-confident people should be given every credit for the same. This overall movement raises the overall self-confidence of the nation and makes it more competitive and a confident participant in the world economic scenario.

Self Confidence Makes You a Great Lover!

Love is a beautiful emotion, a gift of God, given to a chosen few. Not everybody get lots of love in his or her lifetime. However, many times lovers mess it up by not able to meet each other’s expectations by growing too possessive, by becoming overtly shy, by becoming unnecessarily skeptical and what not!

Most of the time, the culprit is within ourselves making us see things much bigger and magnified than they actually are and makes us overreact to events that could have been easily avoided. It is much easier to lose than to build something – especially when it comes to the matters of the heart.

An ignorant and careless person is vulnerable to losing a lot, including his or her life partner as well. This article tells you some simple things that you can remember to help keep you from hurting your partner and keep your love life blossoming. Here are some habits of self-confident lovers.

Self-confident lovers are not jealous

If you are jealous of your partner, this is a sure indication that the foundations of love are not deep enough to withstand the wear and tear of time. Self confident lovers consider their partners as an extension of their own selves and feel happy if somebody has something good to say about their partners. There is no “yours” or “mine” in their relationship. It’s always “ours,” which forms the basis of their love.

Most people get embarrassed or skeptical, or annoyed when someone makes a remark that “Your girl is so beautiful” or “Don’t you think your boyfriend has a talent of impressing girls around.” However, a confident man would say, “Yes. I know she is so beautiful and we are proud to be in love,” while a self-confident girl will shoot back – “Yes. He impressed me too!” Remember that your individual qualities now are a combined “quality pool” belonging to you both, and both partners must treat is as an asset. This is only possible when both of you are confident of each other’s love and commitment.

Self-confident lovers are more forgiving

Since self-confident people can maintain a cool and calm composure in the times of crisis, they are better at analyzing situations and are able to put themselves in their partner’s shoes. This way, they get their partner’s viewpoint and understand their behavior. In many instances, it happens that certain behavior of our partner annoys us or makes us skeptical. Lack of self-confidence can also make us think negatively. However, self-confident lovers believe in the policy of “forgive and forget” and can move on.



Self-confident lovers make their partner more secure and comfortable

In a relationship, looks do matter, but then the characteristics that matter even more are a sensible and rational nature, sense of humor, ability to handle tough situations and more. Self-confident lovers are the best places to look for these attributes. Their self confidence is contagious and they are promising professionals as well.

They enjoy respect and camaraderie, and nurture positive and constructive thoughts. They seem to have the ability to push away problems and provide for their family. In this world where genuine love seems to be an urgent need to calm humanity, a self-confident lover makes us feel secure, comfortable and this life seems worth living for!

Self-confident lovers give their partner a great gift – the gift of independence!

Sometimes love rather than liberate us, actually binds us. So much so that a possessive partner would like to have all the details of our lives. Who are the people you work with? Who was that “Daniel” who gave you a call at 7 in the morning? Why do you want to have your personal car? Why do you have to wear makeup every time you go out? Why are you wearing this dress at this hour…and so on!

Love, which was once the most beautiful emotion in our lives, which seemed to fill us with hope and enthusiasm, now seems to drain out all the energy from us. You feel as if you are bound to someone, answerable to someone and tethered to the wall with limited mobility. Love does not seem much more than slavery. Self-confident lovers realize the importance of independence. They let their partner fly and soar great heights, because they know that at the end of the day, it is to their arms their partner will return!

Self Confidence in Parenting

There's a reason why so many people say it's the hardest job you'll ever have--raising a child. It's challenging, exciting, nerve-wracking, and one of the most amazing things you'll ever experience. Raising a child will put you through every emotion possible, including self-doubt.

Along with the joy of raising a child can come the fear that you're going to do something wrong, create permanent psychological damage, or a whole list of other things that may not go quite right. But relax--keeping a few simple things in mind can help raise your confidence as a parent.

First, know that you will make mistakes. There is no such thing as a perfect parent. If you keep this in mind, you can take a great deal of pressure off yourself. Do your best, of course, but understand that there will be bumps along the road--possibly quite a few of them.

Rather than trying to be a perfect parent, do what you can to prepare for those bumps. Understand where your child is in development and learn what to expect; then expect the unexpected. Also remember that the worst may not happen. Your child may not go through the "terrible twos" or be a reckless teenager. Remember that all children are different. Try not to compare your child or your parenting to others or you may cause yourself unnecessary stress.

Don't believe everything the experts say. Sure, many experts have experience working with hundreds or even thousands of children. Listen to what they have to say, but don't take it as the final say. You know your child better than anyone, and if a piece of advice doesn't seem right for your child, trust your instincts. You're probably right. What may have worked for others may not work for you, and that's okay.

Family and friends are also likely to provide you with ample advice, some of which may be useful and some of which may not. Try to avoid the temptation of giving in to pressure from others if you feel that it is not right for your family situation. This can be difficult, particularly in close relationships. But establishing those boundaries because you know what's best for your child will help increase your confidence simply by knowing that you can determine what's best for you and stand up for it.

Spend time with your child. This may sound like old advice, but more and more studies show that children whose parents show an interest in them are better equipped to deal with some of life's challenges. This also helps you know your child better, which will in turn help you make better choices. It works well for everyone involved.

Seek help when you need it. This may sound contradictory to the earlier statements, but it's actually not. When you know your child and his or her needs well, you have a much better understanding of what advice to accept and what to reject. If you are dealing with a difficult or serious situation, and feel that it is out of your control, it's time to seek outside help.

This does not mean you are a failure. Rather, it shows that you are confident enough in yourself and your parenting to recognize that you may not have all the answers. Certain situations, such as out of control behavior or drug abuse require outside intervention. It's okay to ask for help when you need it, so don't put yourself down if this is the case.

Finally, remember that you are doing the best you can at any given moment. Life doesn't go smoothly all the time, and this is often most obvious in parenting. It's okay to make mistakes and even admit them. And when your children see you do this, you'll show them that a confident person is not perfect and that everyone makes mistakes from time to time. This in turn will help your children feel more confident when they make mistakes, too.

Self Confidence Counseling

To lose your self confidence is to lose your very fiber of trust in yourself. Instead of a person able to freely make sound judgment calls and possesses excellent decision making skills, individuals that lack self confidence are constantly second guessing themselves and often unable to make even the simplest decision without gnawing worry and concern.

If you have found yourself to be slipping into the pit of low self confidence, do not worry, there is hope! Instead of berating yourself over poor actions that occurred in the past, change your future. Seek out counseling that will enable you to rebuild and maintain your self confidence at unparalleled levels.

The first step to self confidence counseling is
making the commitment to seek out and attend these helpful sessions. Whether private or in a group setting, this counseling can be the spark that changes your life. You may enter the sessions as a self doubting, passive individual, but you will leave full of hope and optimism with the ability to totally trust your own actions and judgments. Before you enter counseling, consider any potential obstacles in your current life.

Perhaps your spouse, family member, friend, or co-worker has lowered your self confidence and may be detrimental to your counseling. Perhaps you have experienced low self confidence since childhood and need to break the cycle imposed upon you by your parents or guardians.

Maybe you are in a difficult situation at your job, with employees, bosses, or colleagues constantly tearing away at your self confidence. Whatever the case, you should be prepared to make the commitment to begin a new way of life in order to rebuild your self confidence. Even the smallest changes will help you in this process. Being in the right frame of mind before you begin will assist you to your goal in a quicker, more positive manner.

Once you have determined to seek counseling, begin researching viable options. The World Wide Web is a great source of information on counseling spots in your city or town. If you feel entering counseling will be too overwhelming for you or your schedule does not allow it, the Internet is also a great tool that enables you to virtually meet and discuss with individuals from all over the world.

There are many websites, forums, and chat rooms devoted to individuals working to rebuild their self confidence. You can join these sites anonymously if you are worried about others finding out your private information, but still have the capability to begin some type of counseling. Many individuals have a strong, confidence façade, but lack the same components on the inside. If you find yourself in this situation and do not want the world to know you have a problem with your self confidence, this method of virtual counseling is perfect for you.

Traditional counseling tends to be the most effective method of rebuilding your dwindling self confidence. Universities, hospitals, churches, civic groups, and even local organizations offer counseling of one sort of another. You may be interested in joining a support group in order to interact with others that share your feelings of doubt and distrust.

Many individuals find themselves too shy or ashamed for one reason or another to join a support group, or any other type of group counseling, immediately. If you find yourself in this boat, consider private counseling first, then graduating on to group counseling. If money is a concern, it should be known that group counseling is usually a great deal cheaper—if not free—than private, one-on-one counseling.

What ever form of counseling you decide upon, enter into it with seriousness and determination. If you maintain a positive attitude and strive towards achieving your goals, your self confidence is guaranteed to drastically improve.

Score Killer: Low Self Confidence

Face it, taking a test is a nerve wracking experience. The more important the test, the more nerves are involved and can be a key factor in your score. Some individuals have called for an end to testing, since it is an unfair way to measure the information an individual has learned. Since that is not a suitable option, individuals must shift their focus from “why should I take a test” to “how should I take a test?” Testing is well entrenched in today’s society.

In school, we must take tests to prove our comprehension of a certain subject, we must take driving examinations in order to receive the necessary licenses, and we must tests to determine our general intelligence. However, the way we test is as important as the subject of the test itself. Self confidence plays a major factor in your testing score and for good reason. When you trust yourself, you tend to make better decisions and clearer judgments. You do not second guess your first instinct and confuse yourself due to doubt.

Before you enter into any examination, you should mentally prepare yourself for the test in addition to preparing for the specific subjects covered by the test. One way to do this is to maintain a positive attitude about your capabilities. If you enter into any examination with a poor attitude, you are guaranteed to do poorly on the test. You may have the subject carefully instilled in your mind, but your low self confidence will undermine your attempt every time.

Even if you find you know the answers to the questions present, that voice of doubt in the back of your head will surface and make you question the correctness of each answer you supply. A general rule of thumb is to go with your initial (or gut) instinct. If you feel an answer is correct, more often than not it is correct. However, when your low self confidence kicks in and makes you unable to trust your instincts, problems arise.

One way to conquer the low self confidence killer is to thoroughly prepare for the test before hand. No one does well walking into a test completely unprepared, and you are no different. Take time to review the material carefully in the method to which you are best accustomed to studying. Some individuals find they pick up and retain more information in a verbal question and answer session. Others individuals are visual learners and find the use of cue cards or flash cards exceedingly helpful.

Whatever the case, find your preferred method of study and stick with it! Ask for help from a friend or family member if necessary. After you have reviewed the material, create and complete a practice test. Have a friend or family member administer the examination in a formal manner. This puts you on the spot and calls your self confidence into play. If you can successfully complete the test, whether verbal or written, your self confidence will be boosted.

However, if you take your practice examination and find yourself second guessing your answers, that is a good sign you do not know the material well enough. Consider reviewing the information more in depth, then try the test again.

On the day of the test, forgo last minute cramming. Studies have shown this rush to learn a trivial bit of information is pointless, as your brain cannot retain such hurried information in a reasonable fashion. Instead, take a moment to calm your nerves and reinforce your self confidence. If you are at peace with yourself and your capabilities, you will succeed on your exam.